Rule #15: Don't Settle

There might come a moment when you look around and take stock of what you have around you.  A steady job and paycheck that might not be as fulfilling as you had hoped but lets you afford a decent social life, a living space that might not be perfect but it’s a place to call home, a girlfriend/boyfriend that’s a great companion but you’re not sure if you want to spend the rest of your life with them.  You’ve overcome a lot of challenges to get what you have and to be where you are so far and even though you might not be completely fulfilled, you’re likely to say to yourself “well, it could be worse.”  As long as you have the paycheck, the apartment and the companion, you tell yourself that it’s better to have them than to not, even if they’re not ideal.  However, as a twentysomething just getting started in your adult life, there is no reason why you should have to settle for anything in your life.  It is a struggle to gain security and contentment in life sometimes, but when you are in your twenties and have so many years ahead to find true fulfillment, it’s not worth it to settle for “just okay” at this point in your life.  It’s great to remain positive and grateful for what you do have, but keep striving to reach even higher and to not settle for anything less than what you believe you can achieve for yourself.

Currently, we’re living in a “be fortunate for what you have” society.  The economy isn’t at it’s strongest, unemployment is high and sometimes it doesn’t seem like there’s too much optimism around.  While some of these aspects have affected today’s Quarterlifers, there is no reason why it should bring down any hope for change in the future, and should not encourage any twentysomething to settle for what they know in their hearts isn’t what they want for the rest of their lives.  With some of the harsh realities that our society is currently facing, it just means that you have to get a bit more creative to find your path to happiness.  For example, you may have to stick it out at your job for a little while more, but find ways to pursue your other dreams when you can.  If you want to be a writer, you may have to sacrifice some of your free time to devote to writing.  If you want to get a new car, you might have to be more disciplined in saving a few more dollars here and there.  If you want to start a small business, do whatever reading and planning you have to when you can and start it on the side.  Just because your current circumstances might not allow you to fully pursue what you want right now, no one says you can’t find a way to work towards your dreams in the present moment.  With just some discipline and patience, little by little you can find a way.

How can you tell if you might be settling for something in your life?  Just listen to what your heart is telling you.  There are so many aspects of your life where people will be telling you what’s right and what’s wrong and what you should and shouldn’t accept in your life.  Only you will know in your heart if you are settling for something you know you shouldn’t.  If there is a situation where you feel that it’s not quite right, listen to that instinct.  Don’t feel guilty about exploring options, trying something new or pushing yourself further than you think you can.  Whether it’s a romantic relationship or a career, in any area of life that requires total commitment and devotion it’s never worth giving in to or settling for a situation that doesn’t have the potential to be something your heart truly desires.  No one else can tell you what your life should be so anything less than what makes you happy and fulfilled is only settling for what others are telling you is right.  If you are aware of what your emotions are telling you, then you’ll know how to push yourself above settling and towards the fulfillment you desire in any aspect of your life.

Everyone has dreams, but sometimes it’s easy to slip into comfort and contentment and settle for less that what we ultimately strive for.  Sometimes our fears of losing what we have can distract us from what we can potentially achieve.  You shouldn’t feel like you have to change your whole life overnight if it’s not ultimately what you want, but as a twentysomething with a long future ahead it’s not the time of life to accept all that you have as all that you are going to get or can get without motivation and effort.  Of course there are times when you’ll have to make some sacrifices, but if you keep working towards your dreams and your goals you’ll find that those sacrifices will be worth not settling for less than your highest ambitions.  If you listen to your heart and strive past settling, then you’ll find that there is so much more you can have to be fortunate for than what you have right now.

Rule #14: Break The Rules

On a blog about rules, I understand the irony of including a rule that says “Break the Rules.”  However, as the common saying goes, “Rules are meant to be broken,” and for the current generation of twentysomethings, the rules of the past are consistently and rapidly being rewritten.  It’s those individuals who are pushing the boundaries and breaking the rules that are moving society forward as well as achieving their own personal goals and dreams.  It is in our Quarterlife years when we should be pushing ourselves to our highest personal standards by testing the limits in front of us.  If you break the rules every once in a while, you’ll find that the bar that you and those around you have set for you isn’t high enough and you’ll help yourself reach higher limits and goals than you ever thought was possible.

For today’s generation of twentysomethings, nothing is the same as it was for former generations.  The world is smaller, everything moves at a quicker pace, and the possibilities in front of us seem more endless than they ever were for former generations.  The struggle that both our young generation and the ones before us face is that the rules, expectations and standards are completely different than they were for our parents and older generations, and sometimes this can lead to tension between twentysomethings and our parents, teachers, bosses and role models.  For Quarterlifers today, the rules of the past- graduate college (if you’re lucky), get a job and stay at it for a long time, maybe get married young and have a family- seem like odd notions that don’t make sense to a generation that has more freedom to explore their lives before “settling down” than any other. 

Our generation was brought up to believe that the future was open to be whatever we wanted it to be.  In a way, we were taught to believe we could make our own rules and standards for our lives and break the ones that others before us had to follow.  In this spirit, take advantage of the freedom and opportunities that you are fortunate to have as a twentysomething in this day and age.  Break the rules of the past and create your own rules to live by that make sense for you as an individual.  In the end, you are your only judge, so the rules you make for yourself are the ones that you know will help lead you to where YOU want to be in your life.  Part of breaking the rules means that you are following your own heart, and if you let your heart and your instincts guide you, then you really can’t go wrong. 

Twentysomethings today are already part of a generation that’s breaking the rules.  If you look at the founding of Facebook and the utilization of technology and social media, you can see our generation changing the way that we communicate, discover and learn.  Take inspiration from this when you make a habit to “break the rules” in your everyday life.  Learn to think outside the box and find new ways to approach challenges.  Take more initiative at your school, in your office and in your free time.  Start new projects, finish uncompleted ones, and begin working towards your long held goals and dreams.  The only way that you’ll see your projects, goals and dreams to fulfillment is if you take risks and chances and break the rules every once in a while.  Every great accomplishment starts with someone questioning the status quo and breaking the rules that everyone else followed before them.  When you take a risk and do things differently every now and then, you create the rules that you want to follow for your own life, and even create the possibility to rewrite the rules for everyone else.  The only way to reach your goals is if you set the path, focus on the destination, and make the rules to follow to help you get there.

As a twentysomething in today’s world, you have the opportunity and the freedom to expand your horizons and push further beyond your boundaries than any other generation before.  While our parents, teachers and bosses have gratefully worked and sacrificed to give us the advantages that we have, it does not mean that you should always follow the rules, expectations and standards that they have set before us.  As you develop your own individuality, you should learn to test your limits often, which includes breaking the rules that your parents and other authority figures have expected you to follow.  Part of exploring and developing your true self involves discovering your own rules to live by, and it’s not always an easy process to break away from those who helped you clear your path.  It takes courage to break the rules, but if you take a chance every now and then, then you will see that you sometimes have to take a risk to make your world what you truly want it to be.

Rule #13: Find Your Selfmates, Not Your Soulmates

Part of being a twentysomething involves exploring relationships and finding the friends and partners that you hope will not only remain lifelong companions, but also help you grow as an individual.  For some people this means searching for their “soulmate”, or the one person that is perfect for them in each and every way and will bring true fulfillment to them for the rest of their life.  While this person may exist and may be waiting right around the corner, oftentimes the search can cause unhappiness and stress when they don’t come when you expect or want them.  In our Quarterlife years, as we are experiencing so many different things that constantly change and shape our individuality, it’s not really worth it to stress about finding the “perfect person” to be with.  The truth is, no one is perfect, so it can be a long time before you find a person who is.  Instead, work on making yourself as perfect a person as you are happy being, and then you’ll find the right person or people will appear in your life without much effort.  If you focus on building relationships with people who match up with the various parts of your individuality, then you’ll find that they will not only help build and strengthen those parts, but also help you to discover new aspects of yourself that will also help you grow.  Instead of looking for your “soulmate,” find friends and partners who will be your “selfmates,” or the people who will help you become the true person you want and hope to be.

Looking for your “selfmate” can actually be a pretty easy process once you know the kinds of people to look for.  Start off by finding people that best match up to your values.  You may not have all of the same interests, but if you have the same values, you’ll be more accepting of one another, and appreciate each other on a deeper level.  If you value variety, for example, you’ll probably get along best with friends who like to do something different each weekend, rather than just have the same routine every Saturday night.  If you value family, you’ll most likely get along better with other people who also value family and are close with their parents and siblings.  If you have friends and partners that hold the same values as you do, then you’ll probably find yourself more accepting of their different interests, and might even come to appreciate them as interests of your own.  It’s also important to keep in mind that as you grow as an individual, so will your values.  And as you and your values change, so will your friends.  You may value one thing today and a different thing tomorrow, and you’ll find that the company you keep will look different as your values change.  If you stay aware of this, and surround yourself with the people who complement your values as they change, then eventually it will become easier to find the people who are the best match for you as an individual. 

Finding your “selfmates” and not your “soulmates” also means staying true to who you are as in individual.  This not only means staying true to your values, but also keeping true to your likes and dislikes.  Stay engaged in activities and hobbies that keep you interested.  Join or start clubs or organizations.  One great resource to find some organizations or groups that may align with your interests is Meetup.com, where you can find plenty of other people in your local area who share the same interests and are looking for other people to share them with.  Finding friends, partners and new relationships takes some proactivity and effort, but if you start by engaging in your own interests on a more social level, you’ll find that there’s an abundance of other people who have a lot in common with you.

Finally, finding your “selfmates” includes being open to people who you might not expect to become friends with or enjoy spending time with.  Again, everyone has their flaws and if you come to accept the people around you for who they are, good and bad, the more you might find that they complement your own strengths and weaknesses.  Don’t feel like you have to give up who you are or what you are interested in just to please anyone else, and don’t expect others to do the same.  Even though someone may seem perfect in your eyes, if the only way that they will remain interested in you is if you change who you are, then you’re guaranteed to be unhappy in that relationship.  It also goes the other way: if you expect others to remain perfect as you want them to be then it will often lead to resentment and disappointment from both people in the relationship.  The more open, accepting and understanding you are of the people you form close relationships with, the deeper that relationship will become and you’ll see that they will appreciate you even more, as well.

All of us hope to one day find someone that we can share the rest of our lives with, along with our hopes and dreams.  However, not one of us can ever be sure when that person will eventually appear in our lives.  For Quarterlifers still in a young stage of life, there’s a lot of time to not only find your soulmate, but also time to explore your own life and your own hopes and dreams.  In your twentysomething years, remember to focus on developing who you are as an individual, and to surround yourself with people who will help you grow more confident in that individuality.  If you focus on finding your “selfmates” instead of your “soulmates,” then you’ll find that you have more than just one person around you that will make your life as fulfilling as you want it to be.

Rule #12: Have Fun!

When most people reach a certain stage adulthood, they either accept the belief or are told to believe that you need to start taking life seriously and put the days of fun and no worries behind you.  Life should now be focused on responsibility for yourself and for those around you.  When we reach our quarterlife years, it is true that we will take on a lot more responsibilities (some bigger than others) for ourselves and for others, but there is often a lost message that’s a pretty important one.  The message that encourages you to have fun and enjoy the journey and these years before even greater responsibility comes your way.  In your twenties, you will gain a lot more responsibility but at the same time you will also have more freedom than you probably will at any other point in your life.  If you take advantage of that freedom by doing your best to enjoy yourself and everything that you’re doing in whatever way you can, then you will find greater fulfillment not only in what you’re experiencing as a twentysomething, but also fulfillment in whatever you do the rest of your life.

Think about all of the best moments when you were younger - the ones that were the most fulfilling and rewarding.  I bet that for most of you, they were moments when you were having fun and just being a kid.  Playing little league, taking dance classes, playing video games, spending time with friends.  Most of the things you were best at and most gratifying when you were a kid were often activities you had fun doing.  Maybe for some of you that even included doing your math homework.  If you were good at math, you probably enjoyed doing it!  It’s really not that different when you are in your twenties, but some of the things you find enjoyable, gratifying and fun have most likely changed.  While your definition of enjoyment and fun has changed, the principle remains the same.  If you do what you enjoy, you will get greater fulfillment out of it and have a better quality of life overall.  Now, this doesn’t mean you should go out and be reckless and irresponsible if that’s your definition of fun.  But the principle should apply to many of the other areas of your life.  Live in a city you enjoy and appreciate.  Hang out with the friends you have fun with and who enjoy your company.  Find a career or job that you can find some aspect of enjoyment from, whether it’s specifically at your job or making sure the job allows you to enjoy yourself outside of work hours.  There is no law that says you can’t have fun doing something worthwhile and productive.  In fact if you’re NOT having fun, you probably won’t do as good of a job with it anyway. 

Entering into our quarterlife years, sometimes we can get consumed with our daily responsibilities that we can forget how to enjoy ourselves, or don’t know how to incorporate having fun into our everyday lives.  A good place to start is to make a list of all of the things you enjoy doing most, then use that to brainstorm activities, hobbies and jobs that you might want to pursue.  You don’t have to immediately change your job because you’re not having fun at it, but if you even just take one day a week to focus on doing something that you enjoy, whether it’s a sport, hobby, volunteer activity or whatever, you’ll see that consciously making an effort to enjoy yourself when you can will bring immense benefits to everything around you.  Wherever you live and whatever you do, there is always a time and a place that will allow you to have fun and enjoy yourself in the midst of your other responsibilities.

In the midst of our daily twentysomething lives, we can often get caught up in what we “should” be doing rather than what we “could” or want to be doing.  In the transition to adulthood, and with all of the responsibilities that accompany it, we sometimes forget that it’s okay to have fun and enjoy yourself even as your adult responsibilities may make it seem like it’s impossible to do otherwise.  If you remember to consciously make an effort to find time to enjoy yourself and have fun, not only in your spare time but also in whatever you’re doing (work, school, etc) than the pressures and responsibilities will seemingly decrease only because they won’t seem like burdens on your life.  It may not always be possible to make everything into a fun experience, but the moments you can find enjoyment from will be the most effortless and memorable experiences you might have in your life.  You’re never too young to have fun, but you can grow too old to wish you had enjoyed yourself more when you were younger.  Choosing to have fun when you can in your twenties will not only make your life easier and more enjoyable, but you’ll also find that you’ll be truly following the wants, wishes, passions and desires of your heart that will make your life more and more fulfilling each and every day.

Rule #11: (Sorta) Listen to Your Parents

Growing up, most of us were often subjected to the rules, wisdom, insight and authority of our parents as they supported, sustained and developed us into capable adults.  The influence our parents had on us (good or bad) throughout our lives as children and teenagers cannot be denied and will continue to have an influence on us throughout our quarterlife years.  As you struggle to form your own adult identity and independence in your twenties, it can be a challenge for both yourself and your parents to balance how their influence will continue to shape you as an individual.  While you’re growing up you may be naive in knowing whether or not your parents know what’s really best for you, but when you become an independent twentysomething adult you can make an informed and individual choice about who to be rather than make choices strictly based on what others want for you.  Our parents will always want to support us to help us be at our best, but in our twenties it’s ultimately it’s up to ourselves to decide how their influence will help us get the most out of our lives.

Relationships with your parents can be one of the most rocky, emotional and rewarding relationships we have in our lives, sometimes even more in our twenties than in our tumultuous teenage years when we were first struggling to gain any independence from them that we could.  It is also a time when we come to understand our parents a little bit more.  We gain some of the responsibilities that they carry, so we obtain a new sense of understanding why they are they way they are sometimes and we can sympathize with their adult experiences for the first time.  For many Quarterlifers, it’s also the first time when you can face full independence from your parents, in many aspects.  It might be the first time you’re living on your own, making your own money that you can support yourself with, or even supporting a family of your own.  Along with this new freedom comes a lot of new responsibility and choices.  With independence comes bills and rent to pay, groceries to buy, dinner to cook, taxes to file.  There are a lot of new challenges you might face and it’s in these times when your parents help and support is always most welcome.  When we need a helping hand, our parents will hopefully be the first ones to extend one, so if they do, don’t be afraid to take it.  It’s in these times when they do have more wisdom and knowledge from experience than we do, so it’s better to be accepting rather than stubborn.  Just make sure to be thank them for the help!

Dealing with your parents during your quarterlife years can also be a struggle because there are often times when they may think they know what’s best for you a little TOO much.  A lot of parents have their own vision for what they want us to become when we reach adulthood, and this can be frustrating to deal with sometimes.  Your parents might want you to follow a specific career, live in a particular city, and date a certain type of person.  More often than not, our own vision for our lives is usually different.  We probably want to work a different job, live in a different city and have a different lifestyle than the one that our parents imagine for us and often this can lead to conflict.  When it comes to the pressure and stress you might receive from your parents, use your own judgment as to how to deal with it.  What’s important to realize is that our parents don’t want us to make the same mistakes that they may have made, or any mistakes for that matter.  However, you need to make mistakes in order to discover your own value of right and wrong and know what is best for yourself.  This doesn’t mean you have to always reject what your parents advise you to do, but it does mean that you are the only one who ultimately makes the choice.  Our parents only want the best for us, so value their advice.  You don’t always have to follow it because at the end of the day only you know what’s best for yourself.  In the end, no matter what choice you make, they’ll always be there to support you.  If you make a decision based on fear of what someone else might think, then that’s always the wrong one.

It’s also important to keep in mind that our parents are of a different generation, and they probably didn’t have it as easy (or as hard) and twentysomethings have it these days.  Most of our parents and adults of former generations got married younger, started families earlier, stayed with jobs longer and might not have had the freedom to pursue passions or careers that many young people do these days.  Our parents have made a lot of sacrifices for us, but instead of feeling pressured to honor those sacrifices by being what they may want you to become, take advantage of those sacrifices by being what YOU want to become.  When that happens, it will reward every sacrifice your parents have ever made for you, and both you and your parents will see that in the end. 

When we enter independent adulthood in our twenties, which usually involves breaking away from our parents in a multitude of ways (financially, residentially, influentially, etc), it can be a liberating and also scary experience.  There will be many times when we want the comfort of their support and guidance, and all we can hope is that it will be there whenever and wherever we need it.  However, it’s also a time when you must embrace the influence that your parents had on you throughout your formative years, and use it to formulate a version of yourself that both your parents and you as an individual can be proud of.  It may lead to some disagreements and conflicts at times, but the best way to honor your parents is to honor the best version of yourself that they helped you become.

Rule #10: Don't Compare Yourself To Others

If there is one thing that can never be debated about living life in your twenties, it’s that no two people will ever have the same experience.  In high school and college, you may attend the same schools, take the same classes, get the same test scores, play the same sports, or have the same friends as someone else, but at some point that will change.  Inevitably, you will leave the controlled environment of school and head out into the “real world” where a million different factors will make your life unique from everyone else’s and shape your twentysomething experience.  As you head down your own individual path, it’s common to look around at other people your age and compare yourself to others who don’t appear to be much different than you are, and are at a point in their lives that may be quite different than the point you’re at.  It just so happens that in our twenties this tends to be the root of some of our greatest insecurities.  It’s in our nature to compare ourselves to others, but if you learn to focus on yourself and not worry about where others are in their lives, then you’ll find that there is a lot more to appreciate about what’s already all around you.

For most twentysomethings, you’re at a point in life when you are struggling to figure out your individuality and your own path ahead, and it can be easy to look around and appear as if everyone else around you “has it together.”  It will happen at times that you will see peers your own age (or even younger) gain notoriety, wealth or success before you.  Sometimes it may even appear that they gained that success by not working as hard as you, or by not paying the dues you might be paying to get ahead.  This can lead to feelings of depression, lack of motivation and an overall feeling that you might be “doing something wrong.”  During these times you might feel frustrated and dejected because life is not exactly turning out as planned for you, but it appears to be working out great for others.   

What is important to realize is that the cause of all of these feelings are our own perceptions.  When things may not be going as we planned in our own lives we tend to look around and compare ourselves with our peers, and this can lead to feeling that a lot of other people don’t have the same problems that you do and are better off than you are.  The truth is that they DON’T have the same problems that you do, but in reality they probably have their own set of struggles and challenges that they are facing.  Let’s take work and careers for example.  Let’s say that you’ve been working really hard at your job for the past two years since you graduated college.  You haven’t moved too far up the ladder at your company, but recently you heard about a college friend of yours that in the same two years has advanced a lot farther at their company and are making double the salary that you are.  This can certainly be quite difficult to see that one of your peers is excelling a lot more rapidly than you are, and you might think that they’re doing something right and you must be doing something wrong.  However, that’s really your own perception.  Yes, they may have a better salary and a higher position at their company, but most likely they probably have challenges and problems that you are not aware of, or would even want.  They might have to work many more hours than anyone else and don’t have much of a social life.  Also they might be under a lot more pressure than you would want if you were in their position.  In many ways, they may even look at you in envy and think that you are more fortunate in what you have going at your job.  Unless you walk a day in their shoes, you’ll never fully understand what someone else’s life is truly like beyond their appearances.

It can be very difficult not to notice and compare ourselves to our peers and see where we are in our own lives compared to where they are.  At times it is tough to feel like we’re doing everything we can to be successful while it appears that others around us are gaining success quicker and more easily.  The solution is to just focus on yourself and do what you can to be content with your own life path.  If you feel like you might not be doing the right thing to get the success and happiness that others appear to have, maybe it’s a sign that you might need to make a change in your life, even if it’s a small one.  However you can motivate yourself to move closer towards your own happiness, then it won’t matter how others around you are doing.  We all have our own mountains to climb, but it just so happens that everyone takes a different route to get to the top.  Some routes may seem easier than others, but if you remain dedicated to your own path that you believe is the right one for you, eventually you’ll reach the peak.

Rule #9: Focus on Relationships (Part 2- Types of Relationships To Focus On)

(Don't forget to check out Rule #9 Part 11!)

It can be argued that learning to form good relationships can be the most important thing you do for yourself when you are in your twenties.  Last week I focused on why building strong relationships is a significant rule during your Quarterlife years.  Not only is it important for those around you, but it is also important if you want to focus on being the best individual that you can be.  Learning how to build a solid relationship with the people around you will not only make your life a lot more pleasant and enjoyable, but from those relationships you will also learn a lot of lessons that will teach you a lot about yourself and how you can successfully develop good relationships in all aspects of your life.

There are many different types of relationships that are defined in your twenties, and it is important to learn what you can from each type.  For most twentysomethings, the most mentally and emotionally consuming (and usually stressful) of these types of relationships are our romantic relationships.  In these relationships, it’s important to find out who and what we like in a person but also to see what we ourselves are like in a romantic relationship.  Dating and developing romantic relationships in your twenties is fun, wonderful and enlightening, but also at times a frustrating, scary and heartbreaking experience.  Yet if you are conscious to learn from all of your trials and tribulations in the dating world, good and bad, you will find out what type of person complements you best and also how you can best succeed in a relationship with a significant other.  It may be difficult to move on from some romantic relationships, but there is always something to be learned about yourself that will make you stronger in the long term.  Most twentysomethings want to end up with the right person (if they plan to eventually get married), so learning how to form strong romantic relationships is especially important to learn and focus on.

Another important type of relationship that is key for twentysomethings to cultivate are professional relationships.  A majority of people in their twenties are entering the working world for the first time, and meeting a lot of professionals, young and old, experienced and inexperienced.  Developing strong relationships with professional contacts can be beneficial to anyone in their twenties for many reasons.  Not only can you develop strong friendships with your co-workers, but you can also build a strong professional network that can guide you along your own career path.  Get to know as many of your co-workers individually as you can.  The ones with experience can share with you their own path and teach you about their experiences, mistakes and successes in the working world.  The ones with less experience can share with you their frustrations and accomplishments in navigating the working world for the first few years as you are.   Creating strong relationships with co-workers and your bosses can also help to find a mentor who can personally guide you through your professional path and provide support whenever you need it.  Even if you don’t plan on continuing with the career you might be currently working in, it’s still advantageous to have good relationships with your former and current co-workers because they can often provide good professional advice and support no matter what industry or career path you may choose.

Along with dealing with romantic and professional relationships in your twenties, it is also a great time to focus on and develop a stronger relationship with your family.  There is a common saying that goes “you can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family.”  In our younger years, not every relationship with our parents or siblings was always calm or satisfying.  When we are younger, we are usually struggling to develop our own individuality as our family members are trying to have just as much influence on the individuals we will become, which often leads to clash and conflict.  As we enter into our twenties and further towards adulthood, we become more sensible as adults and can use this time to develop stronger relationships with our family.  We start to see our parents less as overprotective authority figures and can sympathize with them as adults as we begin to share some of the same daily struggles and frustrations that they have encountered for many more years than we have.  If you have solid relationships with your family members, then when you encounter your most difficult moments in your twenties you will always find unconditional support and love to get you through the hard times.  When you break up with a girlfriend or boyfriend, lose a job, or have trouble finding your way, it’s your family that will always be there to help you out.  You may not always find that they will give you the wisest or welcome advice, but from them you will certainly find the emotional support that will carry you through any setback.  It’s that emotional support from your family that you won’t get from anyone else in your life, so it’s important to focus on your relationships with your family so that you can always know when to draw on them for the support you need to get you through this unique time of life.

During our Quarterlife years as we are building a deeper relationship with ourselves, it is important to be mindful that we can’t do it alone.  While it is important to create a strong sense of individuality, it is just as important to develop strong relationships with the people around you who can help in your growth as an individual and also make the journey just as rewarding.  With each relationship you enter into, good and bad, there is always something to be learned about yourself and about how you can create even stronger relationships with others.  If you really work to form strong emotional, professional and supportive relationships with the people around you, you will find even greater fulfillment in every other success you gain in your twenties.